Bodyguard (Saboteur) and Voice of the Tribe

How often do we wonder what or who is holding us back from what we really want? Who prevents us from pursuing our goals and achieving them? Who is responsible for resistance to change within us?

Each of us has an inner Bodyguard (Saboteur), who is responsible not for adventure, joy and happiness, but for safety and survival. This is its main function. The bodyguard opposes everything new and unknown. As soon as we have a desire or a dream, the bodyguard sends us questions.

• How should it work?
• Why do you do it?
• What did you think?
• How do you imagine it?

Thus, the Bodyguard gets exactly what he wants: we give up our desires, we throw our dreams out of our heads.

Do you know this: you are determined to go in for sports, start taking a course, learn languages, plan trips, go to a festival, finally change something professionally, but nothing happens, everything remains the same? Welcome to the world of the Wrecker, our smart Bodyguard. You tend to sleep, you feel the need to eat something. The thought comes to reread old books or do a general cleaning. But you don’t get to the point. You soothe yourself with the thought: “I have time, I can do everything tomorrow morning.”

There is another trick — a sudden eclipse and clouding, when there is only emptiness in the head and lack of concentration on one’s own thoughts.

And the Bodyguard also has the ability to suddenly remind you of eighteen other desires and plans that would actually be much more important than what you just chose.

Hence the sudden loss of interest in the chosen goal: “It’s boring!” A sudden conviction that you are not able to achieve it: “What have I thought to myself! How do I imagine it? I’m not worthy to ask for a raise!”

It is worth noting: our Bodyguard is extremely smart and does not want to harm us. Its main goal is stability. He wants to leave us on a known and predictable path, take away spontaneity, reduce initiative and return us to the old and familiar vector. In a word, leave everything as it is. How to be?

If your goal is really a challenge to your psyche, then you are doomed to fear. Fear is a companion of every creative act. When you start to move forward, there is always shaking. Whenever we start doing something that challenges us and our talents, we will be dealing with self-doubt and self-doubt. This is fine. The Wrecker comes in thousands of forms and works for the benefit of the tribe. The tribe is responsible for tradition and stability. The tribe is where we come from, and what was given to us along the way as unshakable.

Exercise. The Voice of the Tribe

The next page has two columns. The first column will be your “Personal Voice”. In the second column “Voice of the Tribe”. Now the debate can begin.

Clearly list in the first column what you want and dream about. For example: “I want to live outside the city and breed animals, this is my cherished dream.”

Wait a bit.

If you are truly trapped in conflict, the voice of the tribe will not be able to remain calm for long.
The negative answer will be loud: “What kind of nonsense?” Write this statement in the “Voice of the Tribe” column. And then write back again in a personal voice defending your dream. For example, you say: “Many famous people followed their hearts and found the true meaning of life.”

And now the voice of the tribe will answer again: “Yes, and what are these people doing to us? We were born to live in the city and that means a lot to us!”

Try once to bring the conversation to the perfect ending for you. Look for arguments, listen to yourself, get ahead of the voice of the tribe and be cunning. Doing this exercise is the same as standing in a serious battle for your dreams. This inner voice of the tribe will never have the same power over you as before. Even if you lost the debate, you did something infinitely important: you distinguished your voice from that of the tribe. This awareness is a big step towards self-affirmation and self-realization. The tribal voice will not disappear, but you will no longer confuse it with a personal voice.

PLACE FOR DEBATE

Personal voice…
Tribal voice…